Can anyone say they were a slut at one point?

You see them all the time, at the club, in the bar, around school, even in the work place. We always know that one person/s who talk about their sexcapades or their crazy adventures, and we're quick to label them "sluts." But are they really? Or are we just quick to judge a book by it's cover and partial table of consex? (I know, not a word, but I thought it sounded cute)

I know a lot of people who like to talk the talk. I'm never bothered by it at all, and I prefer not to judge, even if I have seen them in action first hand. I remember a time way back when I had just gotten out of what I considered a devastating breakup. We were all young once, and we know how that goes. At the time, I thought "I'm so over this relationship thing!" Seriously? I was only 25. What did I know, right? Exactly.

For the next few months I lived the single life...wow, did I live the single life. There were times I couldn't keep up with my own schedule. The way I saw it, I was having fun, and what I did on my time, was my business....except when people saw me in public. Yikes! I hadn't really thought about this period of my life in a long time until a friend of mine said to me one night, "I've been a big time slut lately." He's about the same age I was back then. I looked at him, and I knew exactly what he meant.

I looked at my friend and nodded my head. I simply said to him, "You're not a slut. You're single and you're having fun. There's nothing wrong with that. You have no one to answer to, and what you do is your business. It's ok, but you don't have to tell people that." And with that, all I could think was "people will talk, and he may have a reputation, so he just needs to watch how he handles himself now."

I remember being younger and trying to be really coy about it. I knew people talked. People like to talk. Hello?! Reality TV! That's why we watch. It gives us water cooler gossip. But does being a slut really mean you're just bed hopping and taking score? Or are some actually looking to just hop into the next relationship. Maybe that's how some handle it. They're looking for the next LTR (long term relationship). Maybe it's not the way to go about it, but maybe it's easier for some.

I understood exactly what my friend was feeling at that point. He often talked about finding someone he could spend time with, go out with, and just all around have fun with. I don't think he was necessarily looking simply for sex. I think he was looking for the next boyfriend. But in retrospect, I think he looked at himself and thought he was being a slut. I knew better.

So while some may look at themselves as sluts, or even look at others as sluts, I don't think it's what they were intending. Somewhere within them always lies some kind of relationship issue. Then again, I'm no expert, on the matter. I'm a journalist, not a therapist.

We should never judge a person by what they've done or whom they've done. I think they want the same thing most of us want. LOVE. I do know one thing for sure. Getting out of a bad relationship, no matter how good you thought it was, really opens one's eyes to many possibilities you were missing out on. I went on to finish school, and later on grad school. I know it sounds cliché to say things happen for a reason, but maybe sometimes you have to believe that some things really do have their reasons.

My POV on HBOs True Blood

I saw it early on, but it didn't hit me until the latter part of this season. Vampires really are gay, metaphorically speaking. For those of you not familiar with the cable tv series, it's a show based on Charlaine Harris' Southern Vampire Mystery books. It takes place in the fictional town of Bon Temps in the southern part of Louisisana, and tells the story of the coexistence between humans and vampires.

So there's the first revelation. Vampires = Homosexuals. Get it? Vampires are often thought of as monsters. For many, gays are still considered monsters. If you don't believe me, ask the fuckers of the Westboro Baptist Church. They wouldn't give a second thought to staking us in the heart. Then again, the jerks who run WBC are monsters in their own right. Vampires are creatures of the night. Gays enjoy the nightlife. Do you see a pattern forming. It's like they're telling the story of homos and heteros coexisting, right? Right.

"Maybe we should be scared. There's more of them than us, and they're pissed!" -Pam Swynford De Beaufort

Pam is an interesting character but has seemed more vulnerable as of late. Her character is snarky and not afraid to hold back how she really feels about someone. She's the perfect gay man: style savvy and successful. I pulled her quote from season six because there was a time when it was scary to be gay. In some places it still is. In fact it's this season that really had me thinking about how much of a correlation I see between this show and real life.

Anna Camp plays the role of Sarah Newlin. Her character is cold blooded and heartless, even I'm afraid of her (and this is a fictional character I'm talking about). She's not even a vampire, but she's dead-set on destroying every last one of them. Think of her as any pastor who's believes that God is telling them to do anything in their power to do away with homosexuality. In the series, she is a pastor's ex-wife. Not only do we later discover in the show that her ex is gay, but he also becomes a vampire himself....uh-oh! Only difference is, Sarah is a character we love to hate on tv. In real life, we would just hate her.

In this latest season, the government comes so close to doing away with vampires, which made me think of people trying to over turn the decision of many states allowing homosexual marriage. Yeah, it's not quite the same, then again it kind of is. It was such an eerie scene when Sarah Newlin nearly escapes death to slowly climb up the stairs as she's citing Psalms 23:4 and 23:6 (King James version) with the intention of killing almost half of the main cast. It's like watching the news when some conservative literally thinks it's God's will to end the homo lifestyle, and you say to yourself: "This bitch gone crazy!" Imagine Michele Bachmann, but with real balls.

Of course the gays are going to be big fans of this show. The vampires are hot (lots of nudity in this show), they dress immaculately, and they'll glamour you. This sunday is the season six finale. Follow the link below to watch the teaser for last week's episode. Just this clip alone gets me all wet. Enjoy :)

http://youtu.be/a3xwfoGkxoo

Goodbye to one of the last of San Antonio's finest.

Photo taken by Stephanie Campos in Dallas, TX, July 2011

I've always said, Erica Andrews was one of the last of the real showgirls in San Antonio. Granted, she lived the last years of her life up in Dallas, she made San Antonio a staple in the drag circuit. If you are a gay man in Texas, it was almost a given that you knew the Andrews name. It's a gay household name, and now the last "real" Andrews is gone.

I considered Erica a Texas icon. She held so many titles as a performer, including Miss Gay Texas USofA 1997, Miss Gay USofA 1999, Miss Texas Continental 2001, Miss Florida Continental 2004, and Universal Show Queen 2004, according to a fan-made Facebook page.

But Erica was more than a performer, she was a genuine person. She was one of the first "showgirls" (as they are known at The Saint in San Antonio) I ever saw perform, and she was one of the last greats of my time, mid to late 90s, the time when I first came out. And I don't mean to sound disrespectful to the craft, but she isn't like the performers today, who seem more obnoxious and loud than anything. Many of the queens today also seem to feel entitled for some reason. Respect and love wasn't just something Erica earned on stage, it was something she earned from her everyday personality.

The first time I met Erica was for an interview in Spots Magazine, September 2004. She would pose as Wonder Woman for the cover that issue. From the knee-high boots to the golden tiara, she would have brought a twinge of nostalgia even to Lynda Carter's eye. She talked about performing in San Antonio for the first time.

"I think that was like in 1988," Andrews said. "It was a place called Phazez. I hadn't gone through my transition yet, so I was like a little young gay boy in drag. I was (impersonating) Cher back then. It was horrible, but the audience loved it. I felt like a star. It was the best feeling."

She worked magic with makeup. It's no wonder she was so successful working for MAC Cosmetics. Erica may not have been born male, but many women I know could have learned a thing or two from her. Many friends were devastated by the news of her passing, but many of them had a story to share.

My best friend Mary quickly recalled the days of hanging out at another friend's place, Michael, for Melrose Mondays back in the late 90s. Yes, Erica could often be found there tanning, along with other friends and fellow performers such as Melissa Crawford, and Henrietta (aka Hot Henrietta). Melrose Mondays were tradition, and at the time Melrose Place was a really good show.

Another friend, Conrad, said he was grateful to know her. In fact, one of the things he loved about her was that she remembered him immediately after they first met. Being the icon she was, he said he never would have expected her to even remember his name, but she did...everytime thereafter. But that's who Erica was. She had this way of letting you know she was acknowledging your presence. My acknowledgement from her was always a wink and a smile. It's something I will always remember.

Rest in peace, beautiful lady. You worked hard to get where you were, and now it's time to go home. Your time here will never be forgotten. Goodbye Erica Andrews (1969-2013).

Another Seven Minutes

If you missed it last year, you definitely don't want Seven Minutes in Heaven 2013 to pass you by this year. The sexually inspired art show will blow you away. Hundreds showed up for last year's show. Never had I seen that many people flock to Fox Motel (at least not admittingly).

The show is once again brought to you by The Invisible Gallery, and curated by the great minds of Jessica Garcia and Linda Arredondo. SMIH 2013 will return to the raunchy Fox Motel on March 2, for this one night only show featuring more erotic art. Last year, the show featured paintings, sculptures, performances, and site-specific installations, which explored ideas of the erotic and notions of sexuality. I can only expect more of the same, and then some, this year.

Contributing artists this year include Phillip Avila, Grayson Bagwell, Vanessa Centeno, Agosto Cuellar, Thomas Cummins, Antonio Diaz, Jessica Ramirez, Abel Rodriguez, Joe Salazar, Erin Stafford, and Katie Wynne.

Fox Motel is located at 302 Newell Ave, just northeast of the downtown area. The show takes place from 6:00pm to 10:00pm. Music will be provided by DJs Shabbytiger and Sneaky Le Sneak. Also there to celebrate their one-year-anniversary is The Institute of Chili (formerly The Chili Queens).

If you haven't made plans for this weekend, you have some now. You'll be at Fox Motel for this erotic art show. Don't be left out in the dark. If this turns out like the last show, every room will be booked. Be there!

Not all customer service experiences should be bad news.

I think people are so used to me talking about my bad experiences dealing with customer service, that I often neglect to talk about my great experiences. So I'm dedicating this blog to the outstanding service that I get everytime I visit the Sears Auto Center at Park North. They're quick, efficient, and always keep me informed.

Although, I've been to this shop on a few different occasions, I have to say, they haven't found a way to disappoint me yet. I've had my oil changed there, I had the coolant flushed, and I've had the battery replaced, twice. Last week I noticed my car was overheating. I decided, after a week, to take my car to Sears to find out what was going on.

After talking to a few friends, who had me try my own analysis by observation, I was told it could be a few different things, from the temperature relay, to the thermostat, to a blown head gasket. I had an initial feeling that it might be the thermostat only because I had a similar situation with a prvious car. I dropped the car off at the shop Friday afternoon for an oil change, and asked them to take a look to see why it might be overheating.

Being that I didn't take the car in until 3 p.m., they didn't get a chance to look at it until after 5. Of course I had nothing else to do but go out for a few drinks with a friend. At about 5:30 p.m. I received a call from the service associate. It seemed there was a tear in a hose that led to the thermostat. I was told they could get the part from the dealership, but since it was so late in the day, they wouldn't get it until Monday, and that I could also get my car the same day.

This almost counteracted the slight buzz I had going from the three bourbon and cokes I had just finished consuming, but I thought quick. I told the associate that I knew the dealership parts department was open Saturdays, and that I really needed my car for a small trip I was making on Sunday. She told me she would be at work by 10 a.m. and would call the dealership at that time, then contact me.

She did exactly that. She called me at 10:30, explained that the part was in stock at the dealership, and that since they didn't have a courier available on the weekend, she would find someone to go out and pick it up so that they could have my car ready that afternoon. Sure I paid over $400, but had I taken my car to the dealership directly, I know I would have paid much more.

I was impressed. They were able to tell me what was wrong with my car and get it to me sooner than they had originally stated. I had taken my car to this shop previously for some maintenance work, according to the maintenance book that came with my vehicle. But when I asked the techs at Sears to service the transmission at 35,000 miles, they were quick to tell me it was way too soon. Had I gone to the dealership, they wouldn't have batted an eye. They would have done it, or claimed to do it, and been really quick to charge me for it. Instead, Sears told me to wait until 75,000 miles.

My point is, I've never had any car serviced any place where they were as honest with me, or as prompt with their service, and for this, I have to give mad props to the Sears Auto Center at Park North in San Antonio. They've definitely got a loyal customer here.