Quick to judge

So I decide to have a nightcap. Nothing out of the ordinary. Well, at least not since I hadn't done it in a while. Lately, I've found that a couple of drinks before bed make me feel relaxed. So back to my nightcap.

I'm having my JB & Coke and Alex asks why I'm drinking. I simply say to him: "I'm not drinking. I'm just unwinding before bed." I don't get it? What's the bid deal? I'm at home. It's safer than going out for a drink or two. I'm just relaxing. Why do I suddenly feel like I'm being judged?

Its not like I'm an alcoholic. At least, I don't think I am. When I think alcoholic, I think someone who is able to function on alcohol at any given time. That's totally not me. I'm toasted after about three drinks, so no way am I going to drink and then try and drive or run an errand.

I think it's only fair to say that I'm being responsible by having my drinks at home before bed, rather than during the middle of the afternoon, don't you think? So I say to all you who like to have your nightcap and feel good: It's ok. As long as you're not getting drunk. That might be a little different. Unwinding after a day of work, I think, is perfectly normal. And even though I've done it every night this week, I'd like to say it's not something I normally do.

TRUST: When do you truly earn it?

It's so easy to lose trust in a friend. Having them earn it again can prove to be very difficult. I had a friend whom I trusted. I wouldn't quite say wholeheartedly, granted this friend wasn't someone I grew up with, nor was it someone I spent countless hours talking with, but nonetheless a friend, or so I thought. This person was someone who had a number of friends in common with me. In fact, I met this person through other friends.
I guess to cut to the chase, this person I considered a friend, blatantly let me down in the worst way. Then again, this person I thought was a friend was only a kid, and still is. Maybe it was my fault for thinking someone that young could make mature decisions, but I usually compare people to myself at that age, and I understood the difference between right and wrong. In fact, I was probably more of an adult at that age than I am now. So I tried to put aside this solecism, but the more time that passed, the more I thought about it, and the more it impaired my perspective of this person. We still have common friends, so just the thought of running into this person in public makes me want to punch them in the throat, but of course I wouldn't because I'm the bigger person, and any amount of thought I had put into this has been a waste of energy on my part.
I can't say I hate this person, whom I considered a friend, but I definitely would not accept this person back into my life. That ship has sailed. And although this person apologized (and it was a half-assed apology by the way....no feeling or remorse behind it, which really helped me see the worthlessness in the friendship we had) for their actions, or as I prefer to call it, "their mistake," I still find it very difficult to believe that someone could act so conniving, and then still want to be friends with me, and act as if they had done nothing wrong.
I think it pretty obvious that this person was not my friend long enough to understand that I don't work that way. This is the reason I find it so hard to trust people sometimes. It just takes one bad egg, I guess, to ruin it for the others. Let's just say this friend is not on my Facebook. As my friends very well know, I don't delete people from Facebook, no matter how much I disagree with something said, or someone's beliefs. I truly believe that everyone has a right to their opinion. This is why we have debates, people! But no matter how much I disagree with you, I would never delete you. It's simply my opinion that if I've friended you, I shouldn't unfriend (unless you're personally attacking me or stalking me). So I happened to look on my page today and noticed this "ex-friend" had deleted me. Well more power to this person for understanding that our friendship was not what is used to be, because whether or not I still liked this person, I wasn't going to delete them from my page, so I guess I do have to commend their actions for taking me off their page.
So what is it you should take away with you after reading this blog? If you're a friend of mine, please don't screw me over. The next blog may just be about you. I don't fight dirty....or at least too dirty. My weapons of choice are sarcasm and wit. My word is all I need because even that can sometimes hit below the belt.

In response to views on the homosexual lifestyle

A friend of mine posted this update on Facebook, and surprisingly I'm just now seeing it. It was one of the most interesting things I had read on the social network in a while. Well, I mean as far as making my gears turn. It really made me reflect on my beliefs as a confused teen. My friend's update is as follows:

"Gay people want equal rights but with events like decadence, pride, splash that promote depraved acts its no wonder why its a battle. It's ammo and a slap 2 the institute of marriage. This lifestyle is looked at as a joke."

In his defense (before anyone begins to cast judgement), he clearly comments immediately on his own post stating that those words are not his, but rather something he had seen on somebody's blog. The post was left in October of 2010.

Apparently there's a new feature I'm just becoming aware of called "Memorable updates" on Facebook. It shows you updates your friends have made in the past. That is exactly where I came across my friend's post. The following was my response to that particular post:

"Wow, how did I miss this post!? I kind of agree with you, Simon. But it's hard to understand it from another point of view. When I was younger, I was embarrassed by the thought of ever attending anything such as Splash, or Southern Decadence, or even the Pride Parade. I thought it was all so stereotypical of the lifestyle. I too believed in the sanctity of marriage as a youngster. Today, my point-of-view has gone total 180. It seems that many don't believe in marriage anymore. Look at all the celebs and even people you might know who can't even make it past 6 months to a year. It's sad. But now I see marriage as being overrated. I don't think it holds the same values it did 50 years ago. But to each his own. I'm happy with where I am, and I don't need a piece of paper to define my relationship. As for my feelings on Pride, Decadence and Splash...I'm much more liberated now, I think. I don't feel that I have to hide who I am. At least not as much as I did back in the 90s or early millennium. I attended decadence last year for the first time with my partner and some friends, and we had a great time. We met people from all over, and just had a great time being ourselves. Then again, NOLA is a totally different atmosphere. Splash is one event I still hope to attend one day. Haven't quite made it there yet. But Pride...Pride is something I never thought as a young man I'd ever enjoy. I'm proud of the person I've grown into, and even though there are a lot of things we may not agree with that are found within the gay culture, it's nice to know that the choice is up to every individual. That's what makes us all so different. Whether it's hot pink shorts at a parade, or a position in politics, homos come in all forms. I never thought 15 years ago that I would see things so differently. Wow, I can't believe how long this post is. LOL!!!"

Not everyone will agree with me, but then again, not everyone will agree with my friend either. I personally believe that everyone's own beliefs come from how they have been raised or by the people they have decided to be surrounded and influenced by. One thing I know for sure is that there is no right or wrong answer. We all have our own opinions and we're all entitled to them, so we should respect them. Not everyone will ever agree with everyone. :)

Gaga at the Grammys

Perhaps people are making just too much a fuss over Lady Gaga these days. It seems everyone wants to take her fashion ability or disability, however one chooses to see it, and compare it to artists of the past...namely Madonna. I think it's safe to say that some of the looks Lady Gaga (Stefani Germanotta) has given her public can be seen as rehashed, but truth be known, Gaga has a plan. She's become quite the little expert on what it takes to stay on top.

Like her or hate her, she's got your attention. And not in a bad way like those Jersey Shore characters. During her special 60-Minutes interview with Anderson Cooper, she admits to toking it up while she writes her music and taking swigs at good bottle of whiskey. But come on, every artist has their way of being creative. But I'd rather not spend an entire blog devoted to Miss Meat Dress herself. Oh who am I kidding?

She even entered the awards show in a contraption which we were told was an egg, outdoing even herself at past awards shows. It's funny how the show is over, yet people will still be talking about this stunt. As crazy as I thought it was, I'm still talking about it! Although I didn't watch the entire show tonight, I knew that shortly after her performance, every social network would be blowing up with comments on her stage presence and that darned egg!

@NYDNgossip tweeted "I'm starting to understand Lady Gaga...First she wore ham, now she's an egg. Next year if she's toast, she'll be deciphered: breakfast.

@Kellyoxford tweeted "Madonna did it 30 years ago guys." That sounds like a little bit of an exaggeration, but you get the point.

@patricklangolis tweeted "and by Whitney Houston I mean Madonna." referring to Gaga's shout out to Whitney as she accepted an award.

Gimmick or not, Gaga is standing her ground letting all the world know that she's here for the long run. Although I'm not her biggest fan, I have to say that she got my attention with her first commercial single, Just Dance. Her latest efforts, I strongly believe to be over-the-top, but it's got a lot of people wondering what's next for Lady Gaga. Looks like we may have to stay tuned for that answer.

the social network experience

I finally got around to watching The Social Network, and it made me realize that I did not even have a clue about Mark Zuckerberg until I saw this movie. I'm not claiming that what I saw in the film was completely accurate as I did not do the research, not did I make this film. But the film certainly made Zuckerberg out to be an arrogant, backstabbing, manipulative douchebag! And that's me being kind.

I remember the first time I signed up for Facebook, I was a senior at Southwest Texas State University (now Texas State University). Someone had sent me an email inviting me to the social network. In fact, if I remember correctly, it was my friend Liz. And of course she was the same person who originally got me started on MySpace way back in the day! But we're not even going there, so lets move on.

At the time, I was a MySpace junkie, although no one would ever admit to that anymore. At least no one my age. I got an invite for Facebook, but was hesitant to try it as I'm sometimes opposed to change. This was back when you had to have a college email in order to become a user. I created an account, but never really logged in again until about a year later when a new friend of mine, Marissa, insisted that I check it out. I distinctly remember telling her that I was sure I was already a member, but that I had never really bothered to check it out.

I decided to log in, and see what it was all about. I'll have to say, like most of you on there, I wasn't comfortable at first. It took a little getting used to, but after a while, I was able to make the transition from the dreaded MySpace to Facebook. Wow, did I transition! I became a Facebook addict. To this day, it's non-stop almost. Like I get a high from checking comments left on my posts and leaving comments for others. It's crazy at times, and ridiculous all at the same time. Who would have thought that making yourself so open to the public would give you such a rush?

Then you have all the protesters who claim they have no privacy on the social network. Darling, first of all, it's exactly that....a social network! Privacy is not really an option. I mean, yes, there are privacy settings in place that you can use, but Facebook, or any other social media outlet for that matter, is all about putting your private life in the public eye. If you have a problem with it, don't use it, plain and simple! It kind of irks me when parents claim that predators can see what their children are doing. Maybe they shouldn't give their children computers. Problem solved.

I think the funny thing I realized tonight after watching the movie, The Social Network, is that yes, they did portray Zuckerberg and his idea of Facebook (or not his idea, as the movie portrays) as a way to meet girls. I never saw Facebook as a dating network. I still don't. Since day one, I saw it as a means of networking. I don't know, call me naive, but that's how I saw it. It's really a great tool to meet people from all sorts of trades (not to meet trade...you pervs! lol). I have met so many people on Facebook, near and far. It's really interesting to see what people are like in different regions of the world.

I have to say though, going back to Zuckerberg, I just can't believe the character in the movie. So he claims it wasn't an accurate portrayal, yet he was allowed to see the screenplay before they started shooting. Why didn't he make any objections then? I don't think I could ever do to my best friends what he did to his. It's sad...just sad. Again, I don't know how accurate the story was, but to do all those horrible things, and for what? Because you're jealous of your best friend. I don't know that I could ever turn my back on a best friend, and I would hope they would feel the same about me. But watching this movie made me realize this guys is an asshole, plain and simple. I thought he even looked like one on Saturday Night Live, and I hadn't even seen the movie yet!

He might be the youngest billionaire in America, but he may also be the youngest asshole billionaire in the country.

http://www.jewishjournal.com/hollywoodjew/item/is_facebooks_mark_zuckerberg_on_the_verge_of_a_breakdown_20100824/

Blame Sarah Palin?

It's sad that when tragedy strikes, society is quick to point fingers. Finding someone to blame is always the easiest way to find solace, or is it?

Seems many want to point to Sarah Palin after the senseless shooting of Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords this past Saturday. Come on people! I dislike Palin as much as the next guy, but it's obvious the shooter had issues. It has nothing to do with Palin, it has nothing to do with the Republican party, it has nothing to do with politics. I was reading an article by Mara Gay on Aol News, in which Gay stated that "Sarah Palin is fighting back against speculation in some quarters that her often-fiery partisan rhetoric may have contributed to a climate that encourages political violence."

Yeah, so sometimes Palin doesn't use the her best judgement when making statements, but society cannot place blame on her. Many of my friend can tell you, I'm very anti-Palin. I've always said, she's not a real politician, she's a cheerleader for politics. It's just sad to see this woman take the heat from so many sides.

In fact, in the article it states that Glenn Beck, of FOX News, reached out to Palin telling her that she has his support and to seek protection for her and her family. I don't think it's quite gotten to the point of lynch mobs showing up at her estate, but you never know these days.

Every news channel has been covering the Arizona shooting all weekend. It's been reported over and over again that 22-year-old triggerman, Jared Loughner, had problems. I just hope others can see that his mental instability has nothing to do with Palin, and that we should stop putting blame on political parties, and see this for what it really is: just another senseless tragedy in the annals of American politics.

A-List: New York gives D-List performances

As one Facebook friend of mine said, "That show set gay rights back 50 years. It shows that gays are ignorant, selfish, pretty, cunty fags." Well I don't know that I'd quite put it that way, ouch. But he makes a valid point. The show is about 5 homosexuals living in New York, living the "A-List" lifestyle. Although not all of them deserve to be on that list, others are doing great for themselves. Let's introduce the men, shall we?

Reichen: This guy is a douche bag in every sense of the word. He obviously likes to keep up his appearance. He's constantly working out on the show. It's just too bad there's nothing he can do about his gaunt face. Reichen is dating Rodiney, a Brazilian model he met while in Miami. He brought Rodiney with him to New York and pretty much allowed him to live there for free, then pretty much had the audacity to throw it in his face. First of all, it was Reichen who brought Rodiney to NY, and made it seem ok that he wasn't working. Reichen was best known for two things. He was the winner on The Amazing Race, season 4 and he dated singer Lance Bass. He was a model and jewelry designer, and actor, although his stint on a gay Broadway musical may cast doubts on the latter. He's a total player, and it shows throughout the show as he flirts with any and every guy that crosses his path. But here's the best part...the asshole seems to have a different explanation when it comes to each of his friends, all so that they don't look at him as the douche bag that he really is. Well luckily, audiences aren't really tuning in to see him every week.

Derek: This guy is a former model, turned agent. He's sort of the pretty boy of the group, but totally high maintenance. His biggest enemy on the show is the immature and wannabe Austin. Derek makes his distaste for Austin very apparent throughout the show, but Derek's got a few things to learn himself. Derek is 27 and claims he's ready to settle down and find Mr. Right. Only problem is, he's not very experienced in the matter. In the latest episode, he had dinner with a man he had previously met named Roberto, ten years his senior. So the two had known each other for what seemed like maybe a couple of weeks, if that, and Derek tells Roberto that he wants the him to meet his mother. WhoTF does that??? That's just relationship suicide! You don't introduce someone you just met to your parents. It's my opinion that you first have to really know someone before you try and get your family to know them. Derek, get a clue!

Mike: Mr. Ruiz doesn't get as much airtime as the other guys. Then again, his life isn't as dramatic as the other guys either. Mike is probably one of the most likable guys on the show because you don't get to see very much of his personal life. He's a famous photographer who has photographed such people as Margaret Cho to Betty White to Zac Effron. He's also directed music videos for Kelly Rowland, Jody Watley and Kristine W. He's seems like a great all-around guy...what else is there to say?

Austin: This kid's claim to fame was his short-lived relationship with designer Marc Jacobs. He was a former model who happened to catch the famous designer's eye, and just as quickly, ended up throwing the kid out to the curb. Austin returned to NY to try to return to the modeling scene, but agents seem to think he's too fat. So in the meantime he decides to make everyone's life a nightmare. He's the kind of kid who thinks he's got everything going for him because he's much younger than the others. The truth is, nobody likes him...well except for Reichen, but we've already discussed that whore.

And finally my favorite of them all...

Ryan: This guy is a stylist with his own salon. I think what makes Ryan stand out to me most is that he's everyone's friend, and he's constantly consoling everyone to get the dish on everyone else. He's so fun to watch. On several occasions, he had invited Austin out to see if there was any way he could help him with his own connections. He would take these opportunities to find out what Austin had to say about Reichen (the two had a past), and how he felt about Derek (whom Austin has openly admitted to hating). Ryan's dramatic expressions will have you rolling on the floor laughing! He's always so calm about everything, but he's clever with how he goes about things. Ryan's assistant, TJ, is just as flaming as the red hair on his head. TJ seems to have no morals, but he can be fun to watch for a laugh or two. I just think it's great that Ryan has a little sidekick.

Watch new episodes of the A-List: New York every Monday night at 9pm on Logo. It's the cattiest, bitchiest, and most scandalous one hour on tv that you'll never get back! It also shows that there are bitchier queens out there than the ones you know personally.